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The Six Divorces


About a million couples find themselves in divorce court every year in the United States. If you are one of them, you may find yourself reeling in response to aspects of divorce that you weren’t totally prepared for.  Some experts surmise that there are really six divorces that occur in any split—and some people are much more impacted than others by the particulars of certain aspects.

Emotional Divorce 

Even if you are 100 percent certain that divorce is the right move, the emotions associated with it may seemingly come out of nowhere.  You may find yourself feeling angry, disappointed, confused, rejected, and elated on back-to-back days.

Legal Divorce 

You may feel powerless as you ascend through the legal proceedings that come with any divorce. But you do have the ability to direct the outcomes. Yes, there will be some legal documents and perhaps even some intimidating moments in a courtroom, but remember, lots of people go through the legal process and survive!

Economic Divorce 

While you surely knew beforehand that property and assets would be divided up, coming to terms with the reality of your new financial situation may be sobering. Will you be looking for a new income source? Will you be cutting back on expenses? There could be some difficult choices.

Community Divorce 

Your family and friends will likely be changing, not to mention the possibility of your entire neighborhood changing.  That neighborhood coffee shop where they know your order when you walk in the door may be hard to say good-bye to. Just remember, new connections are ahead!

Psychological Divorce 

Becoming an entirely independent person can be both empowering and frightening.   No longer will you be relying on a spouse to pick up the slack when it comes to household responsibilities, errands, or holding up their half of a conversation (if you ever did)!

Healthy Adaptation to Your New Reality 

How do you know you’re approaching the break with a healthy outlook?  Consider these signs of healthy coping:

  • You’ve accepted that this is really happening;
  • You’re not holding on to old anger and resentment;
  • You can acknowledge that there were both good and bad times in the marriage;
  • You’ve come to a peaceful co-existence with your ex;
  • You’re realistic about the ways in which you contributed to the breakdown of the marriage;
  • You’ve created new connections and supports to help move forward;
  • You have new goals.

The Legal Support You Deserve 

Getting through the divorce process is different for everyone.  Rest assured that with the dedicated Springfield family attorneys at Courtney & Mills, you will have the legal counsel you need to ensure the best possible outcomes for you. Schedule a confidential consultation in our Springfield office today.

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